It Is All About Marriage

2012-01-06T19:01:00.000-08:00

All week long, New York newspapers have published articles celebrating gay marriage, with front-page photos of men (or women) kissing each other. Almost everyone appears to be rejoicing, but I wonder how happy these couples really are.

I would like to believe that they are happy, and yet I know that marital bliss can be attained only when God’s order – that is, marriage between one man and one woman – is adhered to. Such marriages were long considered to be the bedrock of civilization, but civilization as we know it is now doomed, because this foundation is being destroyed and redefined.

By declaring God’s laws irrelevant, we are sending a wrong message to our children. Instead of congratulating ourselves on being open-minded and tolerant, we should start worrying about the confusion and emotional trauma we are bestowing on our children and youth.

My family was expelled from Germany at a time when Hitler had perfected the art of propaganda. He knew that if you tell a lie often enough, it eventually becomes accepted as truth. This is exactly what happened in Germany, and it is happening in our country now. Lies are proclaimed as truth, and any opposing voice is silenced.

I pray that the many people in our country who still believe in right and wrong will have the courage to express themselves publically on this important issue. We need a national referendum to decide what direction we want for our future. And we need to pray for our children and youth, who are fast becoming confused.

Let us return to the time when our nation put its full trust in God. In the end, God’s truth cannot be silenced, and will be victorious

SAVE A MARRIAGE ADVICE-3 Tips To Help You Rekindle Your Love

2009-06-26T04:55:00.000-07:00

A lot of marriage failed because couples do not take responsibility for the role that they play in a relationship. Very often, blaming the other instead of oneself become the favourite pastime of couples and when there are conflicts, they choose the most convenient mean - walking away instead of trying to save the marriage!
Apparently these couples have short term memories because they are the same individuals who have vowed to support and to love each other through thick and thin! However, divorce has now become an easy way out for people who do not have the courage to salvage what deserves to be salvaged. When couples go through a divorce, they channel all their energies into accusing each other of causing hurt and disharmony in the marriage. They forget that in the process, their children are the ones most deeply hurt! If they have channeled their energies to save the marriage, more than one human being is saved!
So is it possible to save your marriage? Yes, if you had loved each other in the first place, you will definitely be able to rekindle the love and here are 3 ways in which you can save your marriage.

1. Share financial responsibilities Many married couples forget that it takes two hands to clap so now that they are married, both party should be responsible for the family financially. Being married means you are united as one so you should shoulder the burden of raising a family together.
Find out each others' spending style and come to a compromise on how best you can save and at the same time not have to sting on yourself. Spend some time to prioritize what is important to you and to your family, especially if you have children. You need to come to a mutual agreement on how you can divide out the burden of financial responsibility.

2. Never go to bed angry I strongly believe that this is very sound advice to building a lasting relationship because you and your spouse are two very different individuals so there are bound to be conflicts. The important point is that you must find ways to resolve those conflicts. By all means take time off to cool down but after a storm, both of you have to sit down and discuss the issue together. You have to listen to each other and find a solution or come to a compromise but never leave the fight overnight.
It is very unhealthy to go to bed angry and you will only cause a drift in the relationship if you do not try to resolve your problem first. After which, you should forget about the fight and make up for it in bed. It is vital to forget about the problem after the fight had been resolved if you want to save your marriage.

3। Plan time for romance Many married couples forget to plan a time for romance, especially if they have children। In order for a marriage to last long, it is important not to forget to spend time to be intimate. Marriage is not the end of romance, it is the start of a whole new life together. If you sense that something is not right in your relationship, you need to make time for each other so that you can save your marriage.

People are constantly busy nowadays so if you do not find time for your spouse so as to rekindle the love in your relationship, it will hit trouble. It is definitely not worthwhile to spend all your time carving out a career for your family only to discover that you have lost your marriage in the end!
The above are just 3 of the 15 tips in the ebook "15 Steps Towards Improving Your Marriage". Simply apply the strategies in the ebook which you can download immediately and you are on your way to saving your marriage. Don't wait till it's too late to start saving your marriage. You deserve a better life than the present agony and suffering that you are going through. If you have children, you must remember that you are not suffering alone! You do not want your failed marriage to affect your children's psychological development! Seeking the right advice from the right people will help you to save your marriage and start life afresh with your spouse. All you have to do is to take action now and log on to Stella's website at http://www.stellamak.com/recommend/savemarriagetips.html.
You can also grab your 10 ecourse on "Discover the tips to saving your marriage" on Stella's blog at http://www.savemarriage.expertreviewslist.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Stella_Mak

DEALING WITH INFIDELITY:How to keep your relationship

2009-04-23T08:48:00.000-07:00

Infidelity can cause tears, anger and heartbreak। It can also lead to separation and divorce. However, dealing with infidelity with the result that it strengthens your relationship is also possible. When one partner cheats, it could be for any one of several reasons. The cheating partner might have been feeling neglected or ignored. There might have been a lack of intimacy in the marriage or an excess of alcohol one night. These things to happen and if you know how to deal with infidelity, there is a chance to work things out rather than throw everything away over one mistake.

The first thing to do is to make sure you know whether your spouse is cheating or not। You might have a "hunch" about it but this isn't proof! Just because your partner doesn't seem interested in you any more is not proof of an affair. He or she might be tired, stressed at work or have another reason for their lack of interest in bed. If your partner is cheating, they will be thinking a lot about the affair, which distracts them. They might keep their cellphone turned off or on mute. A mysterious second cellphone can also be a sign. Your partner might be away from home a lot with a variety of excuses or always "working late" but not actually in the office when you phone. You could ask your partner straight out. Depending on how good they are at lying and how they feel can give the game away too. Some people even admit to an affair if they are questioned directly.

If you find out for sure that your partner has been cheating, you will probably want to shout, scream, tell the world, pack their bags and throw them out। How to deal with infidelity does vary from person to person, but knowing it is possible to recover from this blow can help you to work through it. Communication is vital and if you feel unable to talk about it, you might want to consult a marriage counselor. It can take years to rebuild the broken trust so plenty of reassurance is vital, as is changing your routines or trying to work out what was missing in your marriage. If both of you want to get over the episode of infidelity, the chances of doing so are obviously much better.

Once you are getting back on track from infidelity, you need to recover and move on with your relationship। You will obviously want to ensure it doesn't happen again. The best way of dealing with infidelity is to discover the reason behind it. If your partner admits to feeling neglected, try to spend more time together. If the reason was a lack of intimacy in your own relationship, try to work on this together. Don't throw blame at your partner every time something goes wrong. They are probably feeling guilty enough already. Remember all the things that brought you together in the first place and try to recreate some of that magic.

Knowing how to deal with infidelity can make the difference between a renewed, stronger relationship and divorce। Once you have discovered your partner's infidelity it is bound to be difficult but by focusing on saving and improving what you have together, you might be able to put the cheating behind you and move on with your relationship and your lives together.

2009-02-23T03:23:00.000-08:00

I-N-C-R-I-B-L-E B U T TRUE Discover how I got married with less than N2,500 in my Bank Account… This is the true inside information that can turn your wedding dreams and aspiration into reality। Dear Friend, My name is Solomon Lawrence। I own and run successful blogs that,include:http://www.wedding-made-easy.blogspot.com http://www.itisallaboutmarriage.blogspot.com. These blogs contain informative articles on virtually everything about Wedding as well as crucial issue on Marriage. Remember a fellow that is not informed will be Deformed! I will like to continue this letter by asking you some questions: · Do you want to save Money on your Wedding? · Do you have the financial power but tired of seeing your mates getting Married one after the other because of lack of ideas to kick start your Wedding Plan? · Are you a man or Woman presently in a Relationship that should have materialized into a Grand Wedding or Marriage but because of lack of Financial Power or Wedding ideas you are about to give up? · Do you know you can have the Wedding of your dreams without spending a fortune? · Do you know that you don’t have to wait for years all-in-the name of saving money for your Wedding? · Do you know that you don’t have to be working in a multi-national company with very fat salary before you can turn your Wedding dream into reality? · Do you know that you do not have to borrow money in order to kick start your Wedding Plans? · Do you know that you Parents do not have to be extremely rich before you can Wed your Lovely Spouse-to-be? · Are you wondering if you will ever get married with the prevailing economic situation in Nigeria? · Does getting Wedded to a Man or Woman you love looks like a mirage because of inadequate information on how to plan your wedding? · …Lets not go further for I have experienced all the above questions.

MY OFFER I have decide to package the answers as well as how to successfully plan and execute your wedding plans whether you are very rich, rich, not too rich or not rich at all (I hate to use the word poor) I have weakness though… What is it? I LOVE HELPING PEOPLE! My simple yet proven information of how against all odds, I got Married even with less than N2,500 in my Bank Account while working in a Lebanese Company.
THIS E-BOOK WILL TEACH YOU: · How to Marry without Borrowing a Kobo। · How to raise Money for your Wedding Plans. · How to Plan for your Dream Wedding Ceremony. · How to Plan a Wedding Budget. · How to set up Committee of Friends for your Wedding. · How to choose a Wedding Reception Venue (Questionnaire that will help you…) · The importance of Pre-Marriage Counseling. · What Wedding Checklist is all about · And lot’s more.
THE ULTIMATE GUARANTEE You have nothing to lose. You are reading this while looking for a way, to quit Bachelorhood or Spinsterhood; my e-book will make it happen by the Grace of God.
HOW MUCH SHOULD THIS EBOOK COST? Apart from sleepless nights as well as time it took me to put this package together, it cost me more than N30,000… I don’t know about your Financial Capability probably you’re well off enough to pay that much। What I know is that there are many others out there who won’t be able to afford that much, which means I have to come down on the price for you. I have decide to give away this product for just N1,800 so as to help you kick start your Wedding dreams.
BONUS Included in this e-book are: - Questionnaire for Wedding Reception Venue। - Various Work Sheet on Wedding Ideas, Bride/Groom guest list, Contacts, the Reception, Wedding Attire, etc.
ORDERING INSTRUCTION Pay N1,800 in my Account at any Branch Oceanic Bank Plc। But the First 25 people to pay N1,500.
Account Name: Lawrence Solomon Bamidele
Account No: 0040001022441
Account Type: Easy Save
Send an email to myweddingsuccess@gmail।com & then text 08079527840 (Text only please) with the following details. Your name. Your email address (if you are Texting). Branch paid into. Date of Payment. It is now my turn to do all the work… we will confirm your payment as soon as you notify me. Once our Bankers say you truly have paid, I will send your package via your email within 24 hours. Please,you may have to check your SPAM box in your e-mail box if you did not see it in your inbox.It is simple! So let’s wrap this up dear friend. For how long will you keep postponing your wedding because of lack of ideas or money? If you truly want to get wedded, when is the time to start? I’m sure you agree that the time is now. By His grace, this e-book can if applied properly help you achieve your wedding dreams. I’m standing by expecting your payment notification. Your package is waiting to be delivered to you right away, I love to see you get married! Your Friend, Solomon Lawrence MD/CEO Above Only Marketing Inc. Myweddingsuccess Group, myweddingsuccess@gmail.com

2009-02-10T07:45:00.000-08:00

I-N-C-R-E-D-I-B-L-E BUT TRUE !!!
Discover how I got married with less than N2,500 in my Bank Account…
This is the true inside information that can turn year wedding dreams and aspiration into a reality.
Dear Friend,
My name is Solomon Lawrence. I own and run successful blogs thacrucial issue on Marriage. Remember a fellow that is not informed will be Deformedt,include:http://www.wedding-made-easy.blogspot.com http://www.itisallaboutmarriage.blogspot.com. These blogs contain informative articles on virtually everything about Wedding as well as !
I will like to continue this letter by asking you some questions:
Do you want to save Money on your Wedding?
Do you have the financial power but tired of seeing your mates getting Married one after the other because of lack of ideas to kick start your Wedding Plan?
Are you a man or Woman presently in a Relationship that should have materialized into a Grand Wedding or Marriage but because of lack of Financial Power or Wedding ideas you are about to give up?
Do you know you can have the Wedding of your dreams without spending a fortune?
Do you know that you don’t have to wait for years all-in-the name of saving money for your Wedding?
Do you know that you don’t have to be working in a multi-national company with very fat salary before you can turn your Wedding dream into reality?
Do you know that you do not have to borrow money in order to kick start your Wedding Plans?
Do you know that you Parents do not have to be extremely rich before you can Wed your Lovely Spouse-to-be?
Are you wondering if you will ever get married with the prevailing economic situation in Nigeria?
Does getting Wedding to a Man or Woman you love looks like a mirage because of inadequate information on how to plan your wedding?
…Lets not go further for I have experienced all the above questions.
MY OFFER
I have decide to package the answers as well as how to successfully plan and execute your wedding plans whether you are very rich, rich, not too rich or not rich at all (I hate to use the word poor)
I have weakness though…
What is it?
I LOVE HELPING PEOPLE!
My simple yet proven information of how against all odds, I got Married even with less than N2,500 in my Bank Account while working in a Lebanese Company.
THIS E-BOOK WILL TEACH YOU:
How to Marry without Borrowing a Kobo.
How to raise Money for your Wedding Plans.
How to Plan for your Dream Wedding Ceremony.
How to Plan a Wedding Budget.
How to set up Committee of Friends for your Wedding.
How to choose a Wedding Reception Venue (Questionnaire that will help you…)
The importance of Pre-Marriage Counseling.
What Wedding Checklist is all about
And lot’s more.
THE ULTIMATE GUARANTEE
You have nothing to lose. You are reading this while looking for a way, to quit Bachelorhood or Spinsterhood; my e-book will make it happen by the Grace of God.
HOW MUCH SHOULD THIS EOOK BCOST?
Apart from sleepless nights as well as time it took me to put this package together, it cost me more than N30,000…
I don’t know about your Financial Capability probably you’re well off enough to pay that much. What I know is that there are many others out there who won’t be able to afford that much, which means I have to come down on the price for you.
I have decide to give away this product for just N3,000 so as to help you kick start your Wedding dreams.
BONUS
Included in this e-book are:
Questionnaire for Wedding Reception Venue.
Various Work Sheet on Wedding Ideas, Bride/Groom guest list, Contacts, the Reception, Wedding Attire, etc.
ORDERING INSTRUCTION
Pay N3,000 in my Account at any Branch Oceanic Bank Plc.
But the First 25 people to pay N2,500.
Account Name: Lawrence Solomon Bamidele
Account No: 0040001022441
Account Type: Easy Save
Send an email to myweddingsuccess@gmail.com or text 08079527840 (Text only please) with the following details.
Your name. Your email address (if you are Texting). Branch paid into. Date of Payment.
It is now my turn to do all the work… we will confirm your payment as soon as you notify me. Once our Bankers say you truly have paid, I will send your package via your email within 24-48 hours.
It is simple! So let’s wrap this up dear friend.
For how long will you keep postponing your wedding because of lack of ideas or money? If you truly want to get wedded, when is the time to start? I’m sure you agree that the time is now.
By His grace, this e-book can if applied properly help you achieve your wedding dreams. I’m standing by expecting your payment notification. Your package is waiting to be delivered to you right away,
I love to see you get married!
Your Friend,
Solomon Lawrence
MD/CEO Above Only Marketing Inc.
Myweddingsuccess Group,
myweddingsuccess@gmail.com
PS: With this e-book you are either a winner or a winner. So HURRY now before the price shots up.

TIPS FOR MEN ON HOW TO IMPROVE A MARRIAGE

2009-02-10T01:48:00.000-08:00

One of the worst things anyone can do is to take their wife for granted.
In the beginning there was love
When we begin a new relationship, it’s so exciting. The buzz, the expectation, the passion…it's intoxicating. We want to impress our prospective partners so we shower them with gifts, buy flowers, go for romantic meals, visit romantic places, all things designed to show your lady how much you love and want her, and hoping to convince her that you’re the man for her.
We all do it. It’s natural. And yet, many of us let this slip after a few years of marriage. But, I hear you say, we can’t afford that lifestyle any more. We want to raise a family, and we must economize. Piffle.
More ways of skinning a cat
So, you need to economize? This is understandable, and almost noble, especially if you want to start a family. But it doesn’t mean that you have to stop showing your love for her. Don’t think that just because she married you, that you can stop wooing her. Women always need to be shown they are loved, desired and wanted.
Instead of taking her out for expensive restaurant meals, prepare the occasional romantic meal at home. It’s so much cheaper than eating out, but more than that, it shows your partner you care, that you have taken the time and trouble to cook for her, and to prepare that private intimate experience to share.
Alternatively you can take her out for a picnic. This has all attraction of preparing a meal at home, but also adds the extra dimension of romantic surroundings if you choose them with thought.
Don’t stop bringing her gifts. They don’t have to be expensive. A flower picked on the way home, a bottle of wine you can share together…just small things, but things that keep the element of surprise there, that show you still care.
Personal grooming
You should always strive to look your best. There is nothing worse to a woman, than if her once handsome, smart man should turn into a scruffy, dirty slob. By keeping up your appearance, you are not only obviously looking good, but you are keeping her attraction to you alive, and you are honoring her by looking good for her.
That’s what she does for you…looks good... for you! It’s not for some other Tom, Dick, or Harry, it’s for you, and one of the simplest and most effective gestures you can do that will go a long way, is to let her know that you recognize it...often.
The physical manifestation of love
Making love is of course the ultimate show of your love for your partner. Make love often. Not only does it cost nothing (practical but true), it shows your wife that you still care for her. Be a little adventurous (that doesn’t mean swinging from the chandelier) be a little naughty...flirting is fun. Above all be gentle and caring.
The key
Showing you still care is the absolute key. Tell her you love her regularly. Not too often. You don’t want to spoil the girl, but say it unexpectedly. It’s so much more effective.
Always make that extra time for her. No matter what other priorities you may think you have at the time, she is more important to you than anything else in the world. You can always make the time if you bear this thought in mind.
Be kind and considerate. It doesn’t mean you have to be effeminate. Women love strong men who, whilst being masculine, can also show them kindness and consideration.
Talk
As simple as it may seem, communication is such an important factor in any marriage. Through life’s journey together, you will meet problems. But, if you can meet these problems together, head on, discuss them, and agree the way forward, your marriage will remain strong

A HAPPY MARRIAGE-5 EASY TIPS

2009-01-30T03:44:00.000-08:00

Everybody wants a happy marriage. However, nobody seems to want to do what it takes to have one. Most people want to have everything go their way, but that's not realistic and most likely won't happen. Therefore, put these 5 tips to work in your relationship so your marriage can be its best.
1. The first thing you need to do to have a happy marriage is be self-less. It's not easy, but it does work. Selfishness and being self-centered are major causes of an unhappy marriage. If you both put this principle into practice your marriage will be problem free.
2. Showing that you care is another way to have a happy marriage. This helps your partner feel loved and secure. Doing the little things like buying gifts for no reason and giving them attention really does wonders for their self esteem.
3. Learning to make sacrifices helps keep a marriage happy by letting things go that could escalate into an argument. Do you want to have a happy marriage or do you need to be right all the time? Don't allow pride to get in the way, keep the peace.
4. Intimacy is essential for a happy marriage with kisses, hugs, touching, I love you's, hand holding and of course sex. Lack of sex or dull sex can put a huge strain on a marriage.
5. Good communication is a must for marriage to be a happy one, no secrets allowed. Everything should be discussed honestly and openly without fear of being berated.
If you put these 5 easy tips into practice everyday you will have a happy marriage. For it to work you both have to be willing it cannot be one-sided.
For more great marriage tips go to http://www.tipsformarriage.org where you will find solutions, not just answers, to all your marriage problems.
by Sonni Carr
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sonni_Carr

CONFLICT IN MARRIAGE-HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE

2009-01-20T06:05:00.000-08:00

Does your marriage need a "turn around"...a "breakthrough"? There are some very simple things YOU can do (not your spouse...you). Why do I say it that way? Because the beautiful thing about relationships is...you can only change what you do, but what you do can be enough to help your spouse change. That is a very powerful concept when you think about it. All psychologists worth their salt, will agree with a very sound principal. That you can not make someone change. Matter of fact, if you try to make someone change, it will probably make things worse. You can not change your husband or your wife. It is up to you to change you and it is up to them to change them...period. Here are 3 things you can do to help your marriage change for the better:
1. Be a better listener. This is huge. Most of the time when we are in a "discussion" that is a little heated, we really don't listen to what our spouse is saying. Most of the time, we are just waiting for a break so that we can voice our opinion, or tell our side of the story. Listening is an art. And if you will practice getting better at it, your marriage will improve greatly. Try this the next time you are in a conversation, discussion, argument, etc. Make a personal commitment to NOT defend yourself, not tell your side of the story (unless asked), but let your focus be on "hearing them, with the intent to understand their side of the story...sincerely". Try to put yourself in their position and see if you have a better understanding of their point of view. 2. Take it a step further. While listening to them tell how they feel, dig deeper by asking questions. Ask them to tell you more. Why do they feel that way? What did you do or say that made them feel that way? Forgot about telling your side of the story and making excuses. Sincerely try to understand their feelings. Now, this is much easier said than done, because in the heat of the moment, it can be very difficult to not give in to your normal tendency to fight back, but I am telling you that if you will try this, and sincerely make an effort to understand their side of the story, it will strengthen your relationship. This is not easy. Let me say it again...this is not easy. But it is very simple. Do you understand the difference? And if you can do it, it applies breakthrough power to your relationship. Guaranteed! It is not the profound, psychological principals that are going to heal a sick marriage. No, it is the simple principals of patience, tolerance, love and forgiveness that bring life changing power into your marriage. And it starts with you being willing to make a sincere effort to "understand" instead of fighting to be "understood". 3. All communication should be geared toward being constructive. Never ridicule and criticize your spouse. If your husband or wife has an area they need to get better in, they probably already know it...or at least, if you just work on you getting better, they will eventually begin to recognize where they need to improve also. Whenever you say mean, hurtful things to your spouse, you are planting seeds of discord that may take weeks, months, years or in some cases may never be forgotten. You are the person that they are closest to in the whole world. In spite of the fact that you may not be getting along, you are the most intimate with them of anyone in their life. When you say things to them that hurt them and tear them down, it does more damage than any other words spoken to them by any other person. The old saying that your mother used to tell you as a child "..if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all", is more important than most people think. Now I'm not saying there should be no constructive criticism in a marriage. But that is something that takes place at times when there is an absence of conflict. In the heat of battle is no place for harsh words. They can leave a lasting scar that may never go away. To your successful marriage...
Learning how to communicate is a huge step in doing a tremendous amount of good toward helping you save your marriage. Learning how to share your feelings doesn't have to be difficult. If you are serious about doing your part to improve your marriage relationship, you must visit http://www.marriagesaver.info. It will change your life.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ron_Stephens

BASIC CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE ADVICE

2009-01-16T05:28:00.000-08:00

Does your Christian marriage need help? If so, take a few minutes to step back and consider this basic Christian marriage advice - straight from the Bible.

1. Give Your Marriage to God

Most "Christian marriages" are Christian in name only. One or both spouses claim to be Christians, and they assume then that their marriage is likewise "Christian." It doesn't work that way. To be a Christian is to be not only a believer in, but also a follower of Jesus Christ. Does your marriage truly believe in Christ? Does your family follow Christ?

The first thing you must do is dedicate (or re-dedicate) your marriage and family to God. Put your marriage on the altar. Give it to God. Don't try to "control" your marriage or your spouse. Give it all to God. From this day forward, your marriage must be God's marriage.

2. Re-commit Yourself to God

Before you re-commit your marriage to God, you may need to do that with your own life. In fact, we should put ourselves on the altar each day (Romans 12:1-3). Are you living for yourself? Are you trying to make yourself happy and/or expecting your spouse to make you happy?

As bestselling author and pastor Rick Warren puts it: "You were made by God and for God, and until you understand that, life will never make sense." Give God back the keys to your life. Give Him control.

3. Pray Without Ceasing

Prayer is not so much about petitioning God and asking Him for things. It's about spending time with God and bringing yourself into a deeper relationship with Him. Truly effective prayer is not possible until you have done the preceding step, which is to give yourself to God. Once you've done that, pray without ceasing.

Pray. Pray. Pray. Never stop praying. Pray in the morning, during the day, and at night. Pray while you're driving. Pray in the good times and in the bad times. And, right now, if you're trying to put your marriage back together, then pour yourself out to God every day (as David does in the Psalms). Give all your burdens, cares, and stresses to the Lord.

4. Love Your Spouse Unconditionally

This is the tough part. You must love your husband or wife unconditionally. (Side note: If you are in an abusive relationship, especially one that is putting you in danger, get out of the house and seek help! You should still love your spouse, but you don't need to put yourself in any more danger). Assuming that you are not in any physical danger, you must commit to loving your spouse unconditionally - and expressing that love in consistent, practical ways.

If you want to know about unconditional love, consider the example of Jesus. You should also read I Corinthians 13. By putting these four principles into practice, you will see positive results in your Christian marriage.

Start transforming your marriage today! Click here for your FREE copy of "Secrets of an Amazing Marriage," plus a free 7-day Marriage Transformation e-course, and more! Take action. Don't delay. Grab your free "Christian Marriage Helper" resources above - and start improving your marriage today! Brian Tubbs is a pastor as well as the author and course manager for ChristianMarriageHelper.com and the Feature Columnist-Editor for Protestantism at Suite101.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Brian_Tubbs

SAVING YOUR MARRIAGE JUST IN TIME-HOW TO AVOID DIVORCE

2009-01-14T04:10:00.000-08:00

There are certain key elements to saving a marriage that you should be aware of. You don't want to end up like the millions of others who have used divorce as a way to resolve the problems with their partners. There are better ways to go about dealing with your differences, you don't have to let the love of your life go because there is a better way.
Anyone who wants to save their marriage must realize that there is a long road ahead. Every single day you must work towards keeping your relationship together. There will still be tough times ahead, which is why you must always keep the lines of communication open with whoever you are with. The more you talk to each other about how you are feeling in the moment, the better chance you have of saving your marriage.
What often happens between two people who are married is they let the everyday things that bother them build up, causing an unspoken tension between the two people. This in turn causes this pent up frustration to explode one day, leading to much larger problems. To avoid having this bigger problems farther down the road, the best thing you can do is to talk to your partner whenever you feel like something isn't right.
Simply hoping that your marriage will work out is not enough. You have to be willing to put in the hard work and dedication needed for your relationship to survive. Many people make the mistake of waiting, putting off these exercises because they don't think it matter, but it does. The sooner you start communicating with your partner, listening to his or her needs and wants, the sooner your marriage will be back on track. Honesty is a key element in going back saving your marriage. Without complete disclosure to your partner, those little white lies start to build up and spin a complex web of anger and frustration between the two people involved. If you want to save your relationship, honestly and communication is key.Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Susan_

LEARN HOW TO SAVE A FAILING MARRIAGE INSTANTLY

2009-01-13T05:19:00.000-08:00

Is your marriage going through a rough patch these days? Are you sensing serious trouble looming in the horizon? Do you think a divorce will soon be in the works? Fear not! This is the article that will make you learn how to save a failing marriage instantly!
In recent years, marriage has taken on a liberal meaning. Some couples don't go to a priest or a judge to have rites of marriage performed over them - they simply live together as husband and wife. Some couples are not even composed of a husband and a wife in the traditional, conservative sense. In its simplest sense, marriage is a union between two people who promise to love each other no matter what until the end of time. As you may have learned over years of married life, the elements of marriage are not exactly easy to deal it. For example, the term "union between two people" can feel like a bore and a task, especially with the short attention span and polygamous nature of human beings. The term "love each other no matter what" can prove hard, especially with the imperfectness that comes with being human. Finally, the term "until the end of time" can feel impossible, especially with how difficult things have been lately. Making a marriage work takes hard work; finding out how to save a failing marriage takes double the effort.
If you know you're marriage is failing, you need to ask yourself whether or not you want to fix things and save your relationship. Sometimes, divorce can be the best option, especially when there is no more love left in your and/or your partner's heart. However, divorce is not the only option and it's definitely out of the question if you and your partner still care about each other but are just stuck in a rut. The first and most important step you need to take on how to save a failing marriage is marriage counseling.
You may not want to admit this but one of the biggest reasons why you're marriage is failing is lack of communication. Communication is an important ingredient in the success of any relationship. In marriage, communication is the rock upon which all things are built. If you and your spouse are no longer talking - whether you're just skipping out on the serious issues or have stopped talking to and with each other completely - chances are, your marriage will fall apart sooner than you think. Marriage counseling promotes communication and gives you and your spouse a venue for discussing your marital problems. This is the reason why marriage counseling is usually short-term: couples need only one session to get things started and work out their troubles on their own from there. Experts who write articles and publish books on how to save a failing marriage always recommend marriage counseling as a significant part of the road to recovery and healing.
It doesn't stop at marriage counseling. If you really want to know how to save a failing marriage, you must be determined to make your relationship last. Major factors that determine a marriage's happy longevity include mutual respect, trust, faithfulness, commitment, and, above all, lovePublished At: www.Isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=316442&ca=Marriage

4 Concepts in Clear Communication Within a Marriage

2009-01-12T04:27:00.000-08:00

Has something recently gone wrong in your marriage, causing one or both of you to lose faith slightly? Often, the key to resolving these types of issues is good communication.
The typical scenario many couples face goes something like this: you were both going about your lives and enjoying your relationship, when you started to notice that things between you were not quite the same as they used to be. Communication started to break down and things got off track. Never fear - it is possible to learn good communication skills to improve your marriage and rekindle your love.
Here are 4 concepts in clear communication within a marriage that can help you both dig yourselves out of your communication hole:
1 - Letting Go of the Need to be Right
Start by asking yourself these four questions:
- Are the issues that led to your communication breakdown really important enough to warrant such a rift in your relationship?
- Are the root causes of your recent problems even worth arguing about?
- By taking the particular stand or position that you have taken regarding these issues, do you really come out ahead in terms of your overall life goals and happiness?
- Could the potential outcome of this underlying issue substantially affect your life plans together in terms of finances, your sex life, your children, your home, or other potentially major aspect of your life?
If you answered "no" to any of these questions, the wisest thing to do at this point may be to drop the issue entirely so that you can both focus on getting to the heart of your communication issues. Many communication issues can be avoided if one or both of you can manage to take a softer stance on the issues that affect you most. Believe it or not, most argument are completely unnecessary and could be overcome if both of you could agree that it is more important to be loved than to be right.
2 - Avoid Playing into What You Think Your Partner Wants
The next key communication concept is that of worrying less about how your spouse is perceiving you or how they expect you to act. It does not make sense to work too hard at trying to be someone you are not. If you do, you wior she sees you so that you can just be yourself. You will please your husband or wife the most when you are comfortable in your own skin and are being your true self.ll end up wasting your energy and you will not able to keep up your false appearances for long. It is important let go of your concerns about how he
3 - Give Yourself the Space You Need
At times when you are feeling frustrated about your relationship or are feeling disrespected by your mate, it is important to give yourself the space you need. While the importance of doing so may not be immediately obvious, it is an important step in learning how to repair your relationship. Whenever you feel like communication has broken down between you and your spouse, remove yourself from the situation in order to get your bearings. When you feel calmer and more relaxed, you will both be able to work from a position of strength.
4 - Take an Unbiased Approach When Analyzing Your Communication Issues
Once you have cleared your head and found your space, it is time to coolly and calmly analyze your communication issues. Once you and your spouse have had the chance to get some distance from the situation, it is important that you both try to focus on the issues at hand rather than the raw emotion that may be getting in the way of clear communication. Avoid blame words and focus instead on your feelings.
These are just some of the concepts in clear communication within a marriage that I have come across after trying everything from self-help books to therapy to good old trial-and-error. I did not come up with these concepts myself, but I have used them to great success in my relationship. What helped the most was finding some real relationship gurus who have turned fixing communication and rekindling marital love into a true science.Published At: www.Isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=333052&ca=Marriage

Finding The Recipe For A Happy Marriage

2009-01-08T02:03:00.000-08:00

By: Robbie T.

If you are going through hard times in your marriage - or even a separation or divorce - you may be on the hunt for books that teach you the recipe for a happy marriage. Choose wisely: many books can be a waste of your time and money! So, how do you choose the best book among the many on the market today? Well, keep reading!
Below I share with you how to choose the best type of relationship book that has the recipe for a happy marriage. My guidance may surprise you.
1 - Do Not be Fooled by the Author's Fancy Credentials
When you find a book with a fancy cover and impressive-looking credentials printed after the author's name, don't be fooled into assuming that this is the best book for you. There are so many academics out here who choose to let their high-priced studies in an ivory tower replace real-world experience. You may have seen or known highly-paid psychologies or psychiatrists who can rattle off mental disorders or neuroses from memory but who are about as warm as a popsicle. You want to avoid those types.
For some academics who write relationship books, instead of spending their time interacting with people, they just use their time to study. Many of them have not really lived the advice they are offering. Why would you go to someone for advice who has never actually "been there" him or herself? No way! Instead, find a book by an author who has actually lived the experiences you are now going through. Maybe they have had their own marriage go sour, or they have helped countless friends out of similar predicaments. Those are the authors you want to trust.
2 - Avoid Books that Make it "All About You"
A successful relationship requires work from both the husband and the wife - and it requires working together to get through the hard times. However, many relationship books ask you to basically turn inward to work on your inner self while completely distancing yourself from your relationship in the meantime. Where is the sense in that? Of course, to repair a broken or troubled relationship and return to a happy marriage, you do need to come from a place of strength and centeredness. But, that doesn't mean the equivalent of becoming a love hermit. Avoid the books that try to steer you in that direction. Rather, look for a book that will give you new information that you can really use - information that can actually guide you on how to have a happy marriage (not just how to be alone and get in touch with yourself).
3 - Look for a Book that Gives You Real, Hands-On Advice
You need to find a book that will you the nitty-gritty, insider information you need most, such as answers to the questions: what do women want? What do men long for? Not only that, the book needs to tell you how to give them what they really want. You need concrete guidance, such as about how to get over an infidelity or how to relieve your own pain in the face of past heartaches.
4 - Look for Testimonials by Folks Like You
Look at the back covers of most of the books you come across in the relationship genre: you will find raving review after raving review. The only trouble is, the reviews you will find there are written by other so-called "experts" - many of whom are paid for their time and/or are close friends of the author. What do those reviews really amount to? Not much. What you want is reviews and testimonials by other "regular folks" who have successfully used the book to fix their own relationships.
Yes, there are many love or relationship books on the market, but most of them are not worth the paper they are printed on. This is because they are written by ivory-tower academics instead of by someone who has not only been through what you are going through - but someone who has helped hundreds of others with their hard-earned knowledge. So, spend a little bit of time finding the right relationship book using these guidelines and you will find that your money has been well-spent.Published At: www.Isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=336116&ca=Marriage

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2009-01-07T02:41:00.000-08:00

How to Fall in Love With Your Spouse All Over Again: Tips to Revive a Stale Marriage
By: Kim

Whether you’ve been together for 40 days or 40 years, marriage is a series of ups and downs. You may not always feel in love with your spouse. In fact, I can almost guarantee there will be times you’ll wonder if you even like your partner at all. It’s not a question of whether you’ll occasionally fall out of love with each other, but more a matter of praying you both don’t fall out of love at the same time.
The secret to a happy -- or should we say successful -- marriage isn’t really a secret at all; the key is in keeping romance alive.
Anything living needs to be fed, and so does your relationship.
* Do Small Kindnesses for Each Other Every Day
Make her coffee before you leave the house in the morning. Put a note in his or her briefcase or sock drawer, where it’ll be found unexpectedly. Text her that you love her while riding home on the train. It’s the little things you do every day that make your spouse feel loved and needed. What little thing can you do to make sure your spouse feels the love?
* Plan Special Times Together
You might smirk at the suggestion of having a weekly date night, but there’s a reason counselors suggest it to couples; it’s a tried and true way of scheduling romantic time alone. Find something you both like to do, whether it’s eating out, biking or walking -- it doesn’t matter what it is, just make the time to do it together.
No babysitter? Have what I call a ‘Kissing and Cooking’ night. Put the kids in front of a video and the two of you can spend time together in the kitchen – tickling each others senses. Call it Mom and Dad’s time to share the love while showing your kids the value you’ve place on your relationship.
Think of how many divorced couples you know, or how many friendships that have fallen by the wayside. We need to spend time with the ones we love. Luckily, it’s never too late to build or rebuild that special bond.
* Respect Each Other’s Interests
You may not always love everything your spouse loves to do, but you can learn to love watching them do it. Think of it this way, instead of loving what he loves, love watching him enjoy what he loves.
Sit on the couch and watch a ballgame even though you don’t like sports. If she loves art, spend the afternoon at a museum or art exhibit. It doesn’t have to be an everyday event, it’s about respecting each other’s interests from time to time with one thing in mind -- giving them your attention and unconditional time just to show how much you care.
* Realize it’s Not Always 50/50
Marriage is rarely a 50/50 proposition. It’s pointless to keep score and become bitter because you feel you’re doing more than your fair share. In reality, there are times you’ll put in 70-percent of the effort and times your spouse will pick up the slack when you can barely devote 20-percent.
It may feel like a tug of war sometimes, but it’s really giving and sacrificing when your spouse is weak and him returning the favor during your tough times. It is the for better or for worse part of your vows played out in every day life.
* It Takes Time and Effort
When you put time into your lawn it looks great. When you put time into practicing the piano you sound great. A happy, healthy marriage takes time, attention and loving care; it doesn’t just happen. Everyone is busy these days and there never seems to be enough time for everything.
Don’t waste time on things that don’t really matter and not leave enough time for the things that do. The time you put into your marriage will create a lifetime of happy, loving memories that you’ll remember for years to come.
So, roll up your sleeves, hoot and holler, hug your honey and do a little dance around your computer because you can start enhancing the romance in your marriage today.
Happy living and loving!Published At: www.Isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=320511&ca=Marriage

4 PRACTICAL TIPS ON HOW TO SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE

2009-01-06T04:52:00.000-08:00

It's disheartening to know that there are lots of unhappy marriages out there and many end up in messy divorces. The fact is, getting a divorce is not the usual solution when a marriage hits rock bottom. There are many ways to save marriage. If both partners are committed to save their relationship, they can always seek help from a reputable counselor.
Aside from counseling services, there are other practical tips on how to save marriage. Take note of the following, for this will help you.
* Learn to realize that there is no such thing as a perfect marriage. Every relationship has its own share of problems, and there are those that are so massive that it will threaten your relationship as a whole. This is all very natural. A couple must learn how to overcome all their problems and keep the marriage intact. Those couples who seek perfection will be doomed to deep disappointment. People will always make mistakes and they must learn how to fix them, especially if they are in a marriage.
* Good communication is essential. Couples who can't communicate openly always experience problems in their relationship. Being honest with your partner is one of the most important ingredients when it comes to saving marriage. Issues of all kinds can be resolved with the right amount of communication.
* Learn how to compromise with your partner. There is a reason why compromise is considered an art, and for a good reason. It's not easy finding a middle ground between two people and their principles in order to come up with something that both of them can live with. Marriage is all about compromise, actually. You can't afford to be selfish when you're married. There are times that you will have to give way, and there are situations that your partner will have to do the same.
* It's all about commitment. Remember that marriage is like having a car. If the car breaks down, you just don't say that you want to get rid of the car, do you? You will do all you can to fix it, of course. Getting rid of a car is usually the last resort, and this is only done when the damage is truly beyond hopeless. How to save marriage relies largely on the amount of commitment that both partners put into it. It just won't work if one is disinterested in making things work.
Of course, there are marriages that can't be saved no matter what measures are taken. There are issues that can't really be solved no matter how much help is extended by counseling. In these cases, divorce can be considered. Just as it's not good to dissolve a union, it's also not a good thing to keep two people who are at odds with each other in a relationship. It's great to know that there are many ways to save marriage, but again, some things can't be resolved and such relationships are meant to be dissolved.

About the Author
For even more tips, visit How to Save Marriage now! Visit my blog at http://howtosavemarriage.org

REKINDLING LOVE IN ORDER TO SAVE A MARRIAGE

2009-01-03T05:44:00.000-08:00

Love is essential in order for a marriage to work, because most marriages are based on the love felt by partners for each other. Unless a marriage is just based on convenience, a union usually dissolves when love is already gone. To save a marriage means restoring love between the couple. It's an unfortunate thing when love fizzles out of a marriage. In order to restore a healthy relationship it's necessary to rekindle the love that you felt for your partner when you first got hitched.
To rekindle the love and passion in your relationship, you should first remember the things that you do for each other during the first stages of your relationship. Remember the times that you served breakfast in bed for your spouse, or the time you ordered a hundred roses just for your anniversary? Those little things are very important when it comes to maintaining the love in a relationship, and you need to bring them back if you want to save a marriage.
An effective way to tell if a marriage is in the doldrums is if the intensity of the sex has dwindled too. Couples who have been together for the longest time usually experience a lackluster period in their intimate life. More often that not, sex will become a bit stale at some point in a couple's relationship. One way to save a marriage is to bring back the sizzle in your sex life. To resolve this problem, make a supreme effort to spend more time with each other. Make love like you once did when your relationship was still young. Remember the passion that the two of you had back then? Passion like that should never wane even when you've been together for many years now. Bring back the sizzle in your relationship by going on a vacation, just the two of you and have a second honeymoon. Take time off from your jobs and the kids and focus on getting to know each other intimately all over again.
Any relationship will have its own share of arguments and bitterness. The important thing however is to learn how to overcome them. Hiding resentment from your partner is a surefire way to dampen the love and passion that you have for your spouse. Learn how to talk things over and always strive to come into resolution. Get over your resentments. . To save a marriage, it is necessary to extend more understanding towards your mate.
Jealousy is a staple in every relationship. It can damage relationships, but it can actually put the love back in your union if experienced in healthy doses. As long as nothing destructive happens as a result of intense jealousy, a little bit of it can help you express how important your partner is to you.
Perhaps the most important thing of all is to remember to tell your spouse how much you love him or her. Knowing that your partner loves you back is essential to save a marriage. Do not say "I love you" on just special occasions; learn how to say it everyday, every chance you get. Being loved and knowing it is the most precious feeling in the world.
How to Save Marriage
Visit my blog at http://howtosavemarriage.org
Mary R. Jones

Steps To Financial Bliss In Marrriage

2009-01-02T06:41:00.000-08:00

While money won't buy love, and it certainly won't guarantee your happiness, problems with managing your finances can (and do!) lead to divorce. However, with careful planning and thoughtful consideration by both of you, your relationship can avoid any nasty pitfalls or potential problems caused by poor money management. Here are some tips to help you on your path to financial security!
• Discuss your issues and goals. Honesty is a key factor in any relationship, and without it your relationship may not fare very will. You need to work with your partner to come up with some goals and possibly a budget. Discuss what is important to both of you; how much should you save? How much should you put back for retirement? Are you going to invest your money? There are a lot of possibilities, and you should think about each one carefully.
• Set a budget! This will help keep you from spending money you shouldn't. With modern technology, you can devise a budget and keep track of all your expenses, usually with one program. Most banks allow you to automatically deposit money from your check into your savings account; take advantage of this, and resist the urge to spend your savings! One of the reasons many budgets fail is that they limit people too much; make sure to leave some room for "miscellaneous" expenses, if you can. This allows you a little leeway to make those purchases that you may not need, but you'll end up buying nonetheless.
• Invest what you can. If you have money left over after your expenses and budget have been satisfied, consider what you should do with it. Sure, you could buy a new TV or a pair of shoes, but do you need either? Instead of spending it, consider investing it; this is, in essence, using your money to make money. It's passive income; it requires some work and thought to make smart investments, but once you invest it you only have to wait and reap the rewards. Now if you bought a car with it, as soon as you drive off the lot you have lost money!
Managing your money and finances is a great way to ensure the success of your marriage; if you are living comfortably, all other potential issues will be easier to deal with. If, however, your marriage is crumbling and you can't pay the bills, you may not be married for much longer!
So do what is best for your marriage; follow my advice and you may just live happily ever after.
You can get more valuable and free relationship advice at the website of http://www.relationship-buddy.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=D._Teoli

LOVE AND ROMANCE FOR MARRIED COUPLES

2008-12-31T02:05:00.000-08:00

In all actuality, there are several different ways that you can express love. To the majority of people, love and romance means a lot. However, unfortunately there are several couples, whether they are married or not, that aren't pleased with this particular part of their current relationship.
Often, when dealing with this particular area of a relationship, marriage enrichment is needed, specifically for those couples that have been married for several years. Even though just hearing the words spoken "I Love You" is very important and special, there are occasionally times that you wish that you were able to tell your mate and hear from your mate those three words, but in a way that is more unique and special.
Here are a couple of ideas on how you can accomplish this:
1. Take the time to rent your spouse's favorite movie, even if that means watching something that you don't necessarily like, and then plan an evening along where you are able to be with your spouse as the special treat is enjoyed.
2. Whenever your spouse gets out of the shower, hand your spouse a cozy, warm towel that has just been heated in the dryer.
3. When you choose to cook your spouse pancakes, pour those important three words "I Love You" onto the griddle and then cook for a minute to allow the mixture to brown. Then you are going to pour some more batter over this mixture in order to create a pancake that is round. The end result is going to be a pancake that displays those very special three words once you have flipped it over.
4. At anytime that your spouse is out of town, take the time to wash your spouse's car and then surprise your spouse by picking him or her up from the airport in shiny, clean car.
5. Take your spouse out to lunch.
6. Get up early enough in the morning to prepare his favorite breakfast and have it on the table as well as the morning newspaper.
7. Instead of hassling your spouse to go along with you to the grocery store, just allow your spouse to stay home.
8. Buy your spouse a subscription to his or her favorite magazine.
In addition to telling your spouse that that you love them, and that they are special, and having a very passionate relationship, you should take the time to adore your mate and what they are able to bring into the relationship that you share. In all actuality, what this means is that you need to appreciate them and love them for the individual that they are, this includes their faults and all.
When you express this type of love and romance, it is referred to as true devotion to your soul mate and it demonstrates that you don't take them for granted.
http://www.answerstolove.com/
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Emma-Louise_Smith

My Wife Wont Make Love To Me-3 Steps To Getting Together

2008-12-29T04:42:00.000-08:00

Have you recently experienced a lull in your marital sex life? Are you saying to yourself, "My wife won't make love to me?" Your first inclination may be to address the issue with her immediately, and this is a common feeling that everyone in your situation experiences.
You may find yourself falling into an emotionally depressed place, and you may find yourself wondering what to do. You may immediately feel like confronting your wife and begging her to open up to you. But is this really going to make things better? Rather than make things better, what it is probably going to do is make your situation much worse - making her feel even more distant from you than ever.
What you should actually do at this point is the opposite of what you are feeling. Do you feel like confronting your wife directly? Don't! Do you feel like getting depressed? Don't! Do you feel like you just want to give up on the marriage and find sexual satisfaction outside your marriage? Don't! Instead, follow these three basic steps and you will have the answer that you need to the age old concern, "My wife won't make love to me."
1 - Fully Acknowledge Your Current Predicament to Yourself
First and foremost, you need to accept the current situation for what it is, within your own heart. Continue to have a positive attitude toward your wife, and allow the reality of your situation to sink in a bit on a conscious level. When you do this, it will eliminate a large amount of the tension and stress that is being experienced by both you and your wife due to your predicament. Taking this stance clears the air, and it allows you some time to coolly consider your options. If your wife realizes that she still loves you, she will be more inclined to being more open to resuming the intimacy you used to share.
2 - Do Not Overwhelm Her with Requests for Lovemaking
Do not make an overt effort at this point in terms of getting your wife to see it your way with your intimacy issues. You should stop communicating with her on this so that you can allow yourself some "thinking time." This may seem counterintuitive, but by no longer pestering her on this issue you are signaling to her that you are mature enough to find the right solution.This will allow her to think about the sexual side of your relationship, as well, so that she can get in touch with how she feels about its value. It will also allow her to have some time to miss that part of your relationship again (remember, your wife has needs, too). When you can separate yourself from your angst about your situation and can calm your nerves, that may be the first step toward healing the underlying issues keeping the two of you out of bed together.
3 - Plan Your Fantasy Sexual Reunion with Her
Once you have completed the two steps mentioned above, it is time to plan your ideal romantic reunion with your wife. Work out in your mind a reunion fantasy - where you will meet, what you will wear, and what you should say and do on your special night. This will allow you to get a better idea of what you really want our of your newly-rekindled relationship (once it happens). But remember, at this point, keep all of this planning in the fantasy world of your mind until you are ready to take the next step and share your plan with your wife.
Now that you have taken these important steps, it is time to put your plan into action. You will need to start breaking the ice with your wife about your intimacy issues so that you are both on the same page. When the timing is right, you need to appropriately share your romantic plan (see Step 3) with her to gauge her reaction.

About the Author
Want access to the entire master plan devised by certified love experts that can rekindle your wife's interest in sex with you? Find the secrets you need at: www.in-your-arms-again.com
Published At: www.Isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=331329&ca=Marriage

STOP YOUR MARRIAGE FROM A BREAK-UP

2008-12-22T05:02:00.000-08:00

Saving your marriage from breakup or divorce is a decision you will need to make and a decisive step you are required to take before any unforeseen problem shatters the once peaceful, romantic, happy and joyous relationship you have erstwhile been enjoying with your spouse.
Where did I go wrong? What did I do or did not get to do that made my marriage to falter out of balance? How did we both manage to get our relationship into such a mess that it is almost unbearable to live with each other or be seen in each others company without feeling irritated to say the least?
When the lines of communication becomes strained, passion and romance dies, love flies out the window, what is left at best is an empty shell that feels cold rather than the warmth and affection in addition to the security, peace and harmony enjoyed before.
Saying that a marriage will never experience period of turbulence will be incorrect. There are periods or occasions in the life of any marriage or relationship that difficulties and challenges show up. One of many options features at such instances:
1. The couples involved draw closer together in confidence and trust to jointly resolve whatever threat or challenge confronted with.
2. The couples concerned can drift apart allowing things degenerate to a point where each party begins to question the rationale behind staying on in the relationship or marriage.
Many marriages and relationships that suffered divorce or breakup could have been helped if couples knew what to do or had access to helpful resources that could have prevented their separation.
Many reasons that subtly serve to gender strife or misunderstanding between couples include the following:
1. Extra-marital affairs
2. Lack of intimacy
3. Unresolved conflicts
4. Children issues
5. Ineffective communication
6. Busy schedules and/or inappropriate priorities
7. Finances or money problems
8. And many more complex and difficult situations
None of the above mentioned problems is new or strange. What is difficult to accept and tough to comprehend is why should any of these be happening to me, my spouse or my relationship?
It is disheartening to discover that a once beautiful, peaceful and harmonious marriage can suddenly become disturbed to the point the couples consider breakup or worse still divorce as the only alternative and last resource to opt for.
I will have you know that you can save your marriage from divorce and your relationship from breakup no matter the problem encountered or challenge faced.
While divorce is not an option to consider in the face of problems or challenges faced in any marriage, breakup too is never the best alternative to adopt as a panacea to ending any dispute or threat perceived in a relationship. Visit Here for additional information and helpful resources to stopping your marriage from divorce and your relationship from breakup today.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Tosin_Ajibowo

Help Your Marriage Survive The Rough Spots

2008-12-19T05:28:00.000-08:00

Every marriage has its ups and downs, its rough periods. Even in the best of circumstances, there are going to be difficult times.
People change.
Circumstances change.
Emotions change.
Over time, the natural ebb and flow of everyday life places incredible pressure on a relationship.
Almost unnoticed at first, you begin to think thoughts that had once been unthinkable. "I love him, but I'm not in love with him. Not anymore." "I'm not attracted to her, not like I was in the beginning." "Maybe if we separated for awhile ..."
The skies can darken in a hurry.
But if you survive these darkest of times, you may find you emerge with a stronger, more trusting relationship than you ever imagined possible.
Here are a few tips that might help you toward that goal ...
== Have a clear understanding of your expectations. Couples rarely take the time to discuss how the little things will work. What does romance mean to each of you? How will the finances be handled? How will your children be raised? What role will religion play in your relationship? What makes you feel loved? What hurts you? How will arguments be resolved? How will decisions be made? What do you need from your spouse, what does your spouse need from you?
== Don't fight unfairly. There will always be disagreements. Deal with the matter at hand. Don't drudge up all your hurts and disappointments from the past. Those are different matters, to be handled separately, at a different time. Keep focused on the issue under discussion and avoid muddying the waters with generalized personal attacks ("You're always nagging." "You never do anything unless I tell you to do it first.")
== Face the issues that are facing you. Hiding from reality never leads to a happy ending. If you're experiencing financial problems, admit it, get it out in the open.
== Be honest with yourself. Take a step back and give yourself a good long look in the mirror. If your behavior is undermining your relationship (whether it's the way you communicate, or how you treat your spouse, or your personal destructive behavior) own up to it.
== Take the initiative. Understand that waiting for your spouse to change first will likely result in no change at all. Actions come first. Thoughts and feelings follow. Change your behaviors and watch your spouse's behaviors change in response.
== Rebuild compatibility. Time has a way of unveiling the differences between couples, especially when your marriage is in trouble. Seek out those interests you have in common with your spouse. Look for opportunities to share activities together. Perhaps it's ballroom dancing, or photography, or camping, or trips to the beach.
== Remember what it was like when you were dating. What was it that first attracted you to your spouse? What made you first fall in love? How can those feelings be rekindled?
== Keep your sense of humor. Life is challenging enough without having to live with a brooding, angry spouse. Laugh out loud the way you did when you were a kid. Happiness is a choice. Exercise it.
Marriage is a sacred vow to love your partner for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till ... well you know the rest. Unfortunately, for many people, the pressures, challenges, and monotony of married life have doused its wonderful positive aspects.
Maybe it's time to rekindle the magic.Source: http://www.ArticlePros.com/author.php?David Silva

Creating an Honest,Truthfull Relationship

2008-12-16T05:35:00.000-08:00

One of the greatest joys and challenges of conscious, intimate relationships is that when we answer the call to love, we are invited to expand upon who we think we are, who we have been and what we feel and think we are capable of. We are invited by forces larger than ourselves to become a more complete, fuller, more loving human being. We are asked to participate in a process that is at once mysterious, exhilarating and terrifying.
When we answer this most compelling call, a part of us dives headlong into the fray, eager for the possibility of a deeper, more intimate connection than we have experienced before. Recent research indicates that during the early stages of being in love, our brains may secrete a powerful amphetamine-like neurotransmitter called phenylethylamine, bathing our central nervous system with an overdose of nature's most potent love cocktail. We are filled with ecstasy and vision and all our circuits are brilliantly lit up. In this heavenly state we are capable of extraordinary acts of unselfish love and caring that occur almost effortlessly.
When we return to earth, however, we are left with our vision of who we can be and the reality of who we think we are. The call to love is always to go deeper and farther than before and if we choose to answer the call, we will inevitably be confronted with a series of choices. One choice is to make a conscious decision of how committed we are to the truth. Have you been committed to truth in your previous relationships? If not, what was the consequence of not committing to truth? And now that you re in a new relationship, are you going to make a conscious commitment for the fullest, deepest, most honest connection you can or are you going to settle for less than that? How far do you want to try to go together? We encourage couples to discuss this openly and consciously, rather than let it play out unconsciously and indirectly as it so often does.
Every time we act and speak from truth, we invite our partner to do the same. Our journey continues to expand and deepen. The equation is simple: Truth = Love = Deeper Connection = Expansion = Greater Opening to Spirit. But if commitment to truth brings such wonderful things to our lives, why is it so rare and so hard? Why are there so many lies, so many affairs, so much hurt and anger being acted out indirectly? Whenever we consider lying to ourselves or our partners, we generally do so to protect some part of ourselves which feels afraid or inadequate. We want to appear better than we are and a little white lie won't hurt anyway, we tell ourselves. It's not really a big deal. What they don't know won't hurt them. We believe it IS a big deal if you compromise and limit the vision of love that the two of you have been called to create. It IS a big deal if you damage the foundation of trust which underlies any successful partnership. It IS a big deal if you re-create patterns of secrets and hiding that you learned in your families of origin. It IS a big deal if you set a precedent of withholding or distorting the honest reality that you experience individually and together. Each time that we distort the truth, we constrict and limit our original call to love and restrict the depth of what we can become. We slip back into the cocoon of our limiting beliefs about ourselves and what we are capable of as human beings.
When we work with couples and encourage them to make a solid commitment to the truth, they often say things like, ''Well I'm afraid to tell her what I really feel... she might leave me'' or ''If he knew that I had done that, he'll hate me forever, so I can't tell him'' or ''If she knew that I wanted to do X, Y and Z sexually, she'd think I was sick.'' At the core, it's always a fear that the truth will not set you free but will unleash a torrent of anger or rejection. But if your relationship cannot handle the truth, then what do you have anyway? If you and your partner are merely colluding with each other to stay in safe territory and avoid difficult issues, then you are settling for much less than what your call to love has invited you to experience.
Commitment to the truth can be uncomfortable and scary at times, but it is also the surest path to ongoing growth and deepening connection available to conscious relationship partners. We encourage everyone to make that commitment and pass it on through words and deeds to your children. If you have struggled with this in the past, be honest about that. And take steps to understand why you might have been less than honest. What healing needs to take place within you so that you no longer need to hide or appear different than who you really are? And remember, the commitment to the truth is not a commitment to always talking about something negative! The truth can be how grateful you feel to be in this relationship or how wonderful it feels to be with someone who shares your vision of an intimate relationship.
We are all capable of greater acts of love and truth than we may believe. We are all capable of being more honest, more clear, more loving, more unselfish. By honoring the original vision that called us to love at this time, we can commit to the truth of what we are experiencing and commit to communicating it to our partners on a regular basis. That is the process that truly will set you and your partner free - to experience the deepest and highest connection possible.
If you or your partner are having difficulty manifesting truth and honesty in your relationship, or there has been a betrayal of trust in the past or present, call us at (248) 546-0407 and let us show you how you can heal the hurts and resentments from the past and create a healthy, loving relationship that will last a lifetime.

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Relationship Institute27172 Woodward AvenueSuite 200Royal Oak, Michigan 48067(248) 546-0407

Forgiveness

2008-12-16T05:20:00.000-08:00

In our work with relationship issues, we have noticed something striking: those people who we guided to include forgiveness of self and other in their process made the deepest and most complete resolutions of their issues. In thinking of these sessions and others with couples dealing with hurt, betrayal and dishonesty, we were struck by the incredible healing power of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a remarkable process that simultaneously engages the spiritual, emotional, psychological, mental and physical levels of being. All of the world’s religions acknowledge forgiveness as one of the highest expressions of humanity. For example, Pastor John MacArthur says, "Forgiveness unleashes joy. It brings peace. It washes the slate clean. It sets all the highest values of love in motion." The Hindu Mahabharata says "Forgiveness is Brahma; forgiveness is holiness; and by forgiveness is it that the universe is held together. Forgiveness is the highest virtue."
The study of forgiveness has recently attracted great attention in the scientific community as well. The Stanford Forgiveness Project focuses on training forgiveness as a way to ameliorate the anger and distress involved in feeling hurt. The idea emerged from several studies clearly showing the harmful effects of unmanaged anger and hostility on cardiovascular health as well as on interpersonal relationships. For example, one study at Harvard School of Public Health found that men who scored highest on an anger scale were three times more likely to develop heart disease over a seven year period than low scorers.
But while everything acknowledges that forgiveness is a wonderful concept, very few people know how to practice it effectively. If you look inside and realize that you are harboring one or more resentments that cause bitterness in your heart, and would like to initiate a process of forgiveness, here are some tips on how to proceed. You may have to repeat this process several times, if it turns out you were not ready to fully release your hurt, and if you are still too consumed by anger.
1. Understand that forgiving does not mean forgetting, or giving permission for the behavior to be repeated. It does not mean saying that what was done was acceptable. Forgiveness is often needed for behaviors that were not acceptable and that you should not allow to be repeated.
2. Recognize that YOU are the only one who is being hurt by your non-forgiveness. You feel the anger, the tightness in your stomach. You are the one rehearsing in your mind what you would like to say or do to 'punish' them. When there is no forgiveness, the bitterness lingers -- and when you could be enjoying today's pleasures, you are upsetting yourself with yesterday's injustices. You give control of your emotions to the person who hurt you. It’s been said that the best revenge is your own calmness.
3. Make a list of what specific actions you need to forgive. What was actually done that caused your pain?
4. Acknowledge your part in each of the items on your list. Did you stay when you could or should have left? Did you draw this energy to you in some manner? If so, then you, too, have some responsibility. Seeing this lets you move away from a pure victim stance.
5. Realize that the other person(s) did the best that they could have done. Why did the person hurt us? They like you are an imperfect human being. Instead of thinking that you would never do such an offense, realize that if you had been that person (with his or her karmic situation), you could have done exactly the same thing. The incident was not about you; it was about the wrongdoer’s misguided attempt to meet his or her own needs.
6. Realize the futility of "grudges." Sometimes we hold a grudge as if that would punish the person, but it rarely has that effect. Nor does it assure that he or she will behave considerately in the future. Many persons actually prefer holding on to resentments because of the hidden "fringe benefits" or payoffs. Examine what your possible pay-offs may be in playing the victim or martyr roles.
7. Acknowledge to yourself in writing or out loud what you have ever gained from the relationship with the person(s) who hurt you।

8. Center yourself, and verbally forgive yourself first for anything you might have done, on any level, to contribute to this hurt and resentment. You might say, "I completely forgive myself for anything I have done to contribute to _____."
9. In a similar manner, express forgiveness for the hurts on your list, one by one. Allow yourself to experience the full range of feelings that emerge.
10. It may also be helpful to create a ceremony in which you get rid of your resentments, symbolizing the ending of the link between you. You may choose to visualize placing them on a raft and watching it drift gently away down a river. You may prefer to burn them and scatter the ashes of your resentment list.
11. Visualize the person you are forgiving being blessed by your forgiveness and, as a result, being freed from continuing the behavior that hurt you.
In this process, it is also very helpful to learn an Energy Psychology technique such as EFT, TFT or EMDR to help you quickly release some or all of the negative emotions in you. Take responsibility for correcting the energy block in your system.
Right now as you think of a hurt or resentment inside, remember that you have a choice. You can decide to be responsible for what you are feeling. Use these guidelines to resolve and release the bitterness, hurt and resentment that is clogging up your heart and life, so that the aliveness and love which is your birthright can again flow through you, and through everyone else you come in contact with. It will also open up the possibility of greater love and intimacy for you as well.

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The Benefits Of Marriage

2008-12-16T05:12:00.000-08:00

If we told you we knew about something that would extend your life span by up to eight years, improve your immune system, reduce the incidence of physical, mental and substance abuse disorders, help you recover from illness and surgery more quickly, result in more satisfying and more frequent sexual relations, and increase your financial net worth, would you be interested in finding out how to get this thing for yourself? How much would you pay for it if it was in a pill? How hard would you work to get it? Just what is this amazing thing? A new miracle vitamin or nutritional supplement? A new tape program advertised in hour-long infomercials on late-night TV?
The good news is that we all are very familiar with this magical something that adds all these benefits to our lives. It's called marriage. That's right, marriage. A book, The Case for Marriage, by sociologist Dr. Linda Waite, a top family scholar at the University of Chicago, and Maggie Gallagher, Director of the Marriage Program at the Institute for American Values, discusses the enormous multi-dimensional benefits of being married.
Among the findings from the research that led to this book:
married people live up to eight years' longer than divorced or never-married people. In fact, over 90% of married people live to be at least 65 years old, while only 60% of divorced and never married people live to this moderate age;
Waite also found that the incidence of all forms of mental and physical illness were reduced in married people as compared with unmarried or divorced people;
percentages of people engaging in unhealthy levels of alcohol or drug consumption were also significantly lower among married people;
married people even have sex twice as often as single people, and report deeper levels of satisfaction with their sexual relations. Unmarried couples who live together also have active sex lives but, like unmarried people, get less emotional satisfaction from it than married people.
married people have more than twice as much total net assets, on average, as unmarried people. Married couples not only save more while enjoying some economies of scale, but married men also earn up to 26 percent more than single men.
moderate domestic violence (defined as hitting, shoving or throwing things at a partner) occurred half as often with married couples and cohabiting couples engaged to marry, as compared to cohabiting couples not planning to marry.
At our workshops, we often hear people say that attracting a healthy partner or working on their current relationship is 'too hard' and requires 'too much work'. Yet in light of these powerful findings, it is obvious that a good marriage can enhance and expand the quality of your entire life more than almost anything else. Why not do everything you can to make yours as strong and healthy as possible? You've got nothing to lose by trying. By not trying, you may be choosing to lose your life, your health, your money and some great sex.
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WHAT IF YOUR HEART STOPS?

2008-12-04T02:48:00.000-08:00

What a dependable little organ is the human heart!Every day,including Sundays and holidays,this little engine keep on pumping non-stop.And it continues even while we sleep.

The heart never complains about the weather and never asks for vacation.It works best when treated well,but continues to serve even when working conditions are stressful.

How much we need the heart!If one eye is blind,we can still see with the other.If one ear is deaf,we can hear with the other.If we lose a leg,we can still walk with a crutch.But we only have one heart.

WHILE WE LIVE
Our "pumping machine"is about the size of one's fist and weighs just a little more than half a pound.It beats about 70 times a minute,4200 times an hour,10,800 times a day,and 36,792 times a year.The heart of a 70 year old person has beaten over 2.5 billion times.

The heart generate enough energy in 50 years to lift a battle ship out of water.In average lifetime,it pumps enough to fill 3.3 supertankers!

According to one encyclopedia,the heart pumps blood through about 12,000 miles of blood vessels in human body.That is about the distance from San Francisco,Califonia to Nairobi,Kenya,or half way around the world.

Although this organ,which keeps our blood constantly circulating,can be weakened by disease and abuse,it generally gives excellent,ceaseless service for many years before it finally stops.When that happens...we die.

WHEN WE DIE
This brings us to a very personal but important question:If your heart should stop five minutes from now,would you go to heaven or hell?I hope you can say the following assurance:"Yes i know that when i die i will go to heaven.I have turned to God in repentance,and received Jesus Christ as my personal saviour.I have put my trust in His precious blood shed on Calvary's cross to atone for my sins.In doing so i have received the gift of God,which is eternal life.So i know i will go to heaven when i die."

But may be all you can say is this:"No i do not know where i will go after my heart stops,but i would really like to know for sure."If that is the case,read on.

The Bible tells us that"all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.(Roman 3:23).The word"all" includes you and me.In fact,it includes everybody.But the Bible also says that"Christ died for our sins"-yours as well as mine(1Corinthians 15:3).

WHAT TO DO
To receive God's free gift of salvation,the Bible says we must trust Jesus as our personal saviour."As many as received Him,to them He gave the right to become children of God,to those who believe in His name."(John 1:12).

Here's how to receive Jesus Christ as your saviour.Ask Him to come into your life,to take away your sins,and help you live for Him?Do this now,and should your heart stop in five minutes,you will know where you will spend eternity-in heaven!

For more counceling and prayers,please contact:
Bro Solomon Lawrence
solo.lawrence@gmail.com
http://itisallaboutmarriage.blogspot.com/gospeltract1

THE MARRIAGE INSTITUTION!!!

2008-12-03T10:12:00.000-08:00

THE MARRIAGE INSTITION IS SACRED AND BEAUTIFULL.GOD ALMIGHTY,INSTITUTED MARRIAGE AND SAYS MARRIAGE IS HONOURABLE IN ALL(Heb.13:4a).MARRIAGE THAT IS BASED UPON THE BLUPRINT OF GOD CAN BE A PURE BLISS AND LONG LASTING,BUT IN LIFE MOST MEN AND WOMEN TODAY,SO MANY HAVE ONE SORDID STORY OR ANOTHER TO TELL ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES.

BY HIS GRACE,I AS AN INDIVIDUAL AND A CHILD OF GOD BELIEVES THAT MARRIAGE IS ONE OF THE PLATFORM A MAN OR WOMAN CAN BE FULLFILLED IN LIFE.

SO MANY ARE OUT THERE TOTALLY REJECTED,DOWNCASTED,AND EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE BECAUSE OF THE NASTY EXPERIENCE THEY HAVE HAD AS REGARDS THE INSTITUTION CALLED MARRIAGE.

IF YOU ARE A MAN OR WOMAN WHO HAS NOT BEEN ABLE TO FIND JOY AND FULLFILMENT IN MARRIAGE;IF YOU ARE A BACHELOR OR SPINSTER WHO HAD SUFFERED SEVERAL H-E-A-R-T-B-R-E-A-K OR H-E-A-R-T-A-C-H-E FROM YOUR PAST RELATIONSHIP,WHICH NEVER LEAD TO MARRIAGE;OR,IF YOU ARE ALREADY ON THIS FLIGHT CALLED MARRIAGE AND YOU ARE BITING YOUR FINGER IN REGRET AS TO WHY YOU MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE;OR IF YOU HAD BEEN DEALT A MAJOR BLOW EMOTIONALLY AND YOU ARE HAVING A FEAR ABOUT GIVING ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP ONE MORE TRIAL...THIS IS THE RIGHT PLACE FOR-A FORUM WHERE YOU CAN COMMENT ON WRITE-UPS,SEEK FOR COUNCELLING OR PRAYERS.

I AM BELIEVING THAT WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE;AND THAT INCLUDE JOY AND PEACE IN YOUR HOME OR MARRIAGE.I AM ALSO BELIEVING THAT A LOT OF SOULS THAT HAVE BEEN HURT ,WOUNDED OR CHEATED IN ONE WAY OR THE OTHER WILL RECEIVE HEALING BALM FROM THE GREATEST OF FRIENDS,THE LORD JESUS CHRIST!WE SHALL,IN LOOKING FOR REMEDY OR SOLUTION TO RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM,TAKE A LOOK AT THE WORD OF GOD-THE BIBLE-THAT CONTAIN ANSWERS TO A-L-L HUMAN PREDICAMENT;THAT INCLUDE MARRIAGE.

IT IS WELL.
Bro.Solomon Lawrence
http://itisallaboutmarriage.blogspot.com/themarrigeinstitution